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WEEKEND WEB: First chitting, now time for fruiting

Hopefully, one day, the tree will give me apples like this.
Hopefully, one day, the tree will give me apples like this.

OUT IN THE GARDEN: Gardening advice for the non-gardener. In association with Baytree Garden Centre, of Weston

Whilst my Charlotte potatoes are chitting like true prize winning champions in the upstairs back room I needed something to do this week.

What about a Bonsai tree? Surely they can’t be that hard to tackle. No, it needs to be something like my potato project where I am going to get something back from my considerable £2.99 investment.

Fruit was the answer. I would grow some bananas. Well it turns out bananas don’t grow that well in Quadring. However, apples do. I’d be an apple grower and whatever was left over from the harvest would be turned into a fine homebrew cider, there was no downside I could see.

As I have admitted previously, I have a medical condition... whenever I try to tackle any type of physical exercise, I find I get very hot, sometimes sweaty, and almost always need a sit down afterwards. It can take me weeks to recover. My wife doesn’t recognise my serious medical condition.

Despite my affliction, I decided that the perfect place to plant my “Katy” apple tree was right outside the back door. Sue though, the plant manager at Baytree, advised me that the best place to plant my tree is somewhere sunny, sheltered and with well-draining soil. Perfect right outside the backdoor it is then, well more like the bottom of the garden it is then.

Technically it’s outside the back door!

I made sure again that I was wearing the correct clothing for the job plus a whistle in case I got into difficulties. I also telephoned my mum to let her know I was in the garden... she does tend to worry.

After literally minutes of heavy toil the hole for the apple tree was dug. I put the speed and quality of the hole down to my powerful manly physique. The hole was a little deeper that the pot the apple tree came in and about twice as wide.

Sue also told me to sprinkle some “Mycorrhizal fungi” over the roots and into the bottom of the hole. As final tip she advised me to push the tree stake into the hole away from the tree roots. That would stop the stake from damaging the roots.

After a congratulatory cup of tea, I back filled the soil around the roots and firmed it in by stepping on the soil around the tree. For anyone watching, I looked like a pro gardener.


Daughter will think I’m ‘spuddy’ great


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