Cookies stuff of IT dreams in class

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Blogger Trish Burgess writes for the Free Press

The teacher had the undivided attention of her Year Two class – a well-behaved group of six and seven-year-olds sitting expectantly in front of their computers.

“Can you remember, children, the word we learned last week to describe different styles of writing on a computer? It begins with the letter ‘f’.”

One little girl’s hand shot up in the air and she pushed it a little bit higher with her other arm to try and catch her teacher’s eye.

“Is that fondant?” she suggested brightly.

Fondant. What a delicious word and quite impressive for a six-year-old. Not quite “font” but all the required letters were present in the correct order.

“Oh if only it were fondant,” replied the teacher wistfully. “That would make computer lessons very yummy.”

This was my regular Tuesday session at Ayscoughfee Hall School, the Spalding primary school where I am also a governor.

For some years now I have assisted the class teachers of Year One and Year Two on a voluntary basis – a thoroughly enjoyable task which brings me into contact with a super bunch of kids who delight and intrigue with their questions and answers.

As the class continued with their work, I’m afraid my mind drifted and the computer suite morphed into the computer “sweet” – a scene from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Imagining rivers of chocolate meandering down the aisles was probably a sign that it was nearly time for morning break.

Later on, still chuckling about fondants, I thought about foodstuffs that have already slipped into techspeak.

Apple, blackberry and orange have been snapped up as trade names and we talk about cookies, spam and chips. Were these words created when the techie folk subconsciously needed a megabyte to sustain them at their desks?

Could computer lessons be more “yummy”? We could ask Lord Sugar to add some sweetness to proceedings, but I’d rather have Mary Berry in charge – the mistress of IT, or rather, High Tea.

I imagine she would instruct pupils how to move text on a page using the “coffee and pastry” method. She might teach them how to type using the quiche board.

How about this for a technical challenge?

Place your sponge finger on the mousse, click on the custard and Swissroll down to the soggy bottom.”

If you can work out what the above means, award yourself some brownie points... of the gooey variety.

Enough of all this nonsense: I had better chocolate log off. Pass me a strong cup of coffee. Java please!

If your hand is up in the air, desperate to share your own showstoppers, you can send me a tweet @mumsgoneto or comment online.