STRAIGHT TALK: Will this ‘kinky’ fashion hit our high street?

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THE shortest skirts ever worn in history – apart from by hunky ancient Greek warriors – came out when I was a teenager and I wore them.

Knee length and over-the-knee boots were called kinky boots then and I wore them too, both kinds.

Hot pants, likewise.

Models on the Paris catwalks strode out bra-less in sheer organza blouses worn for effect, not modesty.

Courreges turned out white and silver space-warriors with keyholes displaying bare skin in all sorts of unexpected places.

It was new, it was exciting, and my friends and I took what still seems a fairly innocent delight in it all.

I should have grown out of buying fashion magazines, 40 years on, but now the summer’s getting past its best I always take a look at what’s going to be in vogue for Autumn/Winter 2011.

Well! I had to look at the glossy cover again just to check I hadn’t reached something down from the top shelf by mistake.

Jostling for attention across the pages is a marching army of female sex-workers who’ve been let out of their dominatrix dungeon to stalk the streets.

They’re wearing chains, sleek pencil skirts, corsets and skin-tight trousers made of black rubber, leather, satin and pvc.

Accessories featured include one black metal corset complete with padlock, stacks of teetering spiky black heels with spiky toes, fishnet and polka-dotted stockings and killer boots that can properly be described as kinky.

Scary enough.

But what really shocks me isn’t so much the clothes, which after all aren’t nearly as revealing as most of the things we wore back in the 60s, but the knowing comments on how best to wear them.

The fashion editor fills a thousand-word column with advice to young fashionistas on how to tread what she describes as the very fine line between looking like sex on legs without too closely resembling an actual sex worker.

One useful tip is to definitely buy a second-skin rubber skirt that has all the fetish appeal of the material’s clingy texture but to avoid shiny rubber or PVC. Shine as well as feel is stepping over the line into tackiness, apparently.

I love brave fashion statements, but for once I’m quite glad that it’s fairly unlikely anyone in Spalding will be adopting this particular next big thing.

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