Guardian Angel

The latest news from our girl about town...

Angel had to laugh recently when her recently divorced friend showed her a letter from her solicitor, which referred to her “strange” husband. He was a bit of a weirdo, but we think whoever typed the letter meant “estranged”.

* Doing a bit of administrative housekeeping lately, Angel had to make several calls to various utility providers.

Her credit card provider still holds the record of seven automated messages before you actually get to talk to a real-life person, but TV Licensing and Anglian Water score four apiece.

* One of Angel’s friends is a very well trained and dutiful husband. He felt a gentle elbow in his ribs when his wife’s car alarm sounded one very frosty night and it was he who left the warmth of their double bed to sort it out while she remained cosily beneath the duvet.

There was an equally errant car alarm that could be heard in court one at Spalding Sessions House on Thursday.

During an adjournment, the legal adviser told the presiding magistrate: “I am told that’s your car alarm going off.”

The Justice of the Peace also dutifully left to restore peace.

* Spalding Bus Station has been particularly treacherous underfoot these past few days and Angel sympathises with the passengers who have been almost skating on compacted snow and ice to and from their bus stops.

It’s been just as bad for the car drivers parking on there – and paying the district council more than £1 a day for the privilege.

How much does it cost for a bag or two of salt and someone to sprinkle it?

And what’s the cost of a first impression for someone newly arrived in Spalding on a day out on the bus?

nSpring Gardens in Spalding has a new menace – a dog owner who isn’t picking up after their pooch. There’s fresh, yellow-ish poo there on a daily basis and Angel sincerely hopes someone will not only spot the dog owner but report them too.

* Does it feel to you like it’s 2002 all over again? It didn’t to Angel until one of her thoughtful and resourceful colleagues offered her a wall calendar for that year and said: “It’s exactly the same as this year.”

* Angel has just one question – why do all teenage boys currently look like One Direction rejects? Ok, Angel is a few years (decades!) past her teenage heyday, but this latest hairstyle trend is not What Makes You Beautiful (a 1D song title for those not in the know).

No doubt when the boy band wannabes look back at photos of themselves in a few years time they will be asking the same question as Angel’s friends do who sported a Pat Sharp-style mullet or Kevin Keegan-style perm back in the 80s – what were we thinking?!